Holly's Page

This page will eventually be about Holly, but right now there's not much here.

We do have a couple of second-trimester pictures, though...

Well, Holly just gave birth (on Sunday April 13th) and has pretty much forbidden any documentary evidence of what she's looked like for the past couple of days.

Actually, there are some pictures of Holly in the hospital, but she won't let them near the website. :)

This one is the closest you'll come to seeing Holly's hospital adventure in pictures:

You can hardly blame her for being camera-shy. She woke up at 6:00 A.M. last Saturday to find that her bag of waters had ruptured. She wasn't having so much as a hint of contractions.

When she went up to the hospital, she was immediately given Pitocin (sp?) to induce labor. And labor she did... for the next 26 hours.

During this time, Holly's cervix made some progress, but the baby's head was nowhere near the right position. So, she ended up getting a C-section. Talk about the worst of both worlds!

Holly is recovering nicely in most ways, but the healing incision makes it difficult to hold (and, therefore, to feed) little Daphne.

As much as I would love to be one of those parents who lets their kids roam around in the mud eating bugs, I just can't. Proof of this is that I am seriously considering purchasing a product called Germ Doctor. Is this a little too much? I have been reading all about how parents today are too clean. I even came across an article that informed me that washing my hands too much can allow bacteria to flourish. Yikes! Well, at least I am not crazy enough to buy the Nursery Air Purifier. If you think that is nuts check out their knee protectors. These are not on Daphne's wish list.

It seems like every year when the weather starts to change from warm to cold I get sick. Poor Daphne has also been sick. It is not a good combination for the both of us to be sick at the same time. To make matters worse I have a screaming headache. It is awful. I never get headaches like this. Jack suffers from them all the time (being the caffeine addict that he is), but I hardly ever get them. I am sure that it is the very beginnings of a brain tumor. The worst part is that I can't take anything because I am breastfeeding. The truth is that I am able to take less medications now than when I was pregnant. Six months ago I would have been able to take a Sudafed, but not now. It seems that everything gets into breast milk. I even read this afternoon that losing weight too fast can cause the toxins that are stored in my body to be released into my breast milk. Lovely! I guess that is another excuse to hold onto the extra 20 pounds that just won't come off. Thank goodness for BreatheRight nasal strips. At least when I use them I don't wake up with that claustrophobic feeling like I can't breathe.

Daphne is Mr. Manic right now. She is happy then sad then happy all at the same time. She also grabs at everything. Her little fingers are always going. She grabs at my nose, skin, hair, and anything else she can get ahold of. She has also discovered that she can make a scratching noise with her fingers. She is always scratching at the furniture and at her diaper. She picked up a plastic hanger while I was putting away laundry today and started wacking me with it. I am all for children learning through discovery, but I think physical abuse is where I draw the line.

In other news Jack has me using a new blogging program called Movable Type. I know that for many of you who read this learning new technology is exciting and stimulating and all of that, but I have no patience for it. Jack says, "How is it even different?" He has made so many adjustments to make it look exactly like the one I was using before. He says, "The only thing that is different is the color." But, I know that it is different and that is all is takes for me to resist the change. In fact, until he tricked me into using OS X by downloading a bunch of OS X-only games, I was set on using OS 9 for the rest of my life. Sadly, he has made it look almost exactly like OS 9 and has to hide the Dock because I can't stand the way it bounces and the way it magnifies. Essentially everything that makes it interesting to other people.

I know that none of you are going to believe this but Daphne crawled 4 feet today. She crawled completely off the blanket that I put on the floor when she plays with her toys. Seriously, she crawled. The strange part is that she crawled BACKWARD! She lifted her body up on her hands and knees just like she would if she was going to crawl forward, but did it backwards. I had to look it up and I guess this is a normal thing for babies to do. I also think that it is strange for her to do it this early. I guess that is normal to according to this poll. I guess I had better start babyproofing soon.

I am the last person who has the right to complain about Daphne's sleeping habits. She rarely sleeps less than 9 hours at night and most of the time she sleeps for 10. She rarely (almost never) wakes up at night and she goes right back to sleep after being cuddled for a minute. We are very well rested parents.

I wish that someone could explain to me why she has such a hard time napping. Why is it that she will sleep for an hour in the afternoon while I watch TV or read a book, but if I try to put her in her crib she wakes up within 5 minutes of being put down. It seems that as long as she is in my lap sleep comes easy, but the minute her head hits those sheets she starts moving around. We even put up darker curtains in her room hoping that would help,but it doesn't. This is the same child who will go to sleep in her crib at night and won't wake up even if I run the vacuum. In the afternoon even the click of her bedroom door being closed is enough to wake her up. Strange.

I think I have complained about that enough. I know that I am not going to get any sympathy. So I will move on. What books are Daphne enjoying this week you ask? Well, I will tell you. I am reading and re-reading The Runaway Bunny. This is very difficult because it makes me want to cry. Jack and Daphne are reading a wonderful book When the Moon is High. This is a nice quiet before bedtime book. Eliana is reading Daphne Goodnight Moon, Daphne's favorite book.

So, I went into the Motherhood at the mall (to buy a new nursing bra) and I got a little melancholy. I was jealous of all of the women shopping for cute maternity clothes. It's not that I enjoyed being pregnant, but there are things about it that I miss. Here for your enjoyment are the top five things I miss about being pregnant:

1. Of course the first thing would be being able to eat and eat and eat all the chocolate chip cookies that I want.

2. The illusion that I would lose all of my "baby" weight by six weeks post-partum. The illusion was so great that I took regular clothes to the hospital with me. I actually thought that I would be able to leave the hospital wearing normal clothes.

3. Pants with big elastic waists in the front (panel pants). This seems odd to me since I nearly cried the first time I had to go shopping for them. Let's just say comfort, extreme comfort.

4. Did I already mention not having to worry about how fat I looked? Ok, I miss the attention I got being pregnant. People were so kind to me. They would ask about how I was doing or just smile warmly at me. Now all of that attention has shifted to Daphne. Not that I mind. I like it when people smile at her, but sometimes I feel like the invisible mommy.

5. The anticipaton of having a baby and all of the things that go with it. The shopping, deciding on a name, thinking about what she would look like, and what it would be like to hold her in my arms.

Hmmm, but really it's being able to eat all those warm, yummy, chocolatey cookies!

I wish someone would please tell me why my normally good natured daughter has started screaming her head off when I try to put clothes on her. I keep looking around thinking I am pinching her or causing her bodily harm (that is how loud she yells), but I haven't. It doesn't matter how carefully or quickly I put her shirts on. She never peeps when I take clothes off before her bath. I think this is proof of her being a drama-baby. So, please tell me why she acts this way.

Jack and I tried to watch a DVD last weekend, but it turned out to be impossible. Daphne has no patience for our taste in entertainment. She will watch the Wiggles or Baby Einstein and nothing else. She gave the movie zero stars and two thumbs down. What Jack and I were able to see of it we actually liked. Maybe when she is older we will rent it again and actually watch it without stopping every fifteen minutes.

Finally, It would be rude of me to list all of the things wrong with Iowa City. It is actually a nice place to live. It would be perfect here in the fall with the leaves changing and the weather cooling off if it weren't for the annoying football traffic. We got stuck in it by accident a few weekends ago. It was awful. It think the only thing more annoying than football in Iowa is the damn box elder bugs. Interestingly, I grew up near Brigham City Utah home of Box Elder High School. Oddly their school mascot is the bee not the box elder bug.

Isn't technology wonderful? My grandmother who is in her 90's e-mailed me today for the first time. She was also able to see pictures and video of her great-granddaughter. She lives in Utah and we aren't able to visit as frequently as we would like to. It is so great that we can keep the folks back home up to date on Daphne's life. It makes it easier to live so far away.

So, here is another entry filled to the brim with guilt. My little baby has an ear infection. Yes, an ear infection. I thought ear infections only happened to kids who attended daycare. I guess I was wrong. She has had a little cold for a few days that turned into a cough on Thursday. She had a cold when we were in Utah and were told not to worry unless she had a fever. So, I figured I had it under control. I am trying very hard to be a calm and rational mother. My definiton of calm mother includes not calling the doctor EVERY day (even though I would like to call her EVERY day).

So, I thought we were being rational by just letting the cold ride itself out as long as she wasn't suffering too much or developing more symptoms (like a fever). She started being cranky when we put her on her back in her crib (sure sign of an ear infection). She also has been waking up every few hours at night wanting to nurse (another clear sign of an ear infection). Her nose has been both stuffed and runny (a leading cause of ear infections). I feel just terrible that I waited three days to take her in to the doctor. She was very angry when the doctor examined her. I have never seen her that angry. She screamed and screamed. No amount of "Oh What a Beautiful Mornin'" could soothe her. Please take note that Daphne does NOT like having things put in her ear.

Anyway, Jack is now at the pharmacy having her prescription for antibiotics filled and we are going to give her Tylenol for the pain. We are also going to give her a few extra hugs and kisses to make up for the poking and proding at the doctor's office.

Today is Daphne's six-month birthday. I sure do like her. She is the greatest thing that has ever happened to Jack and me. She gets cuter and cuter every day. I love that her little personality is starting to show through. My favorite thing about her this month is that she has started to develop two distinct cries for us. She has a special cry for her Daddy and a different cry for me. The proof of this is that when she does her daddy cry Jack will leap towards her to pick her up and comfort her much faster that I will. When she does her mommy cry Jack will look up and wander over while I run to her aid. Interesting the way babies manipulate situations. It is like through months of crying for our attention she has figured out what pitch and volume of cry will make each of us get there faster depending on what she wants. Of course the cry that gets me running sounds like her pain cry. I am not sure what distinguishes the cry she uses for Jack, to me it just sounds like she is whining.

For her sixth month birthday she decided to poop all over my nightgown this morning. The nasty antibiotics that she is taking (which smell like if Hell were made of bubblegum) are giving her diarrhea. In a bonus episode she puked the entire contents of her stomach (bananas included) all over her Aunt Mauria last night. Does Hallmark make a card for that?

Daphne still has her cold. Her nose is runny, her ears hurt, she has diarrhea, and generally doesn't feel good. BUT, she still insists on practicing her crawling. She has been getting up on her hands and knees rocking back and forth. She is very frustrated that she can't move forward. She crawls backward with ease, but the only thing she can do forward is this weird little bounce. It reminds me of the game leap frog. Poor Daphne, she is so determined that it is almost pathetic. Well, gotta go. I hear her crying out for me. Pray for me that she hasn't soiled her diaper.

I am having one of those tedious days. I think it is because the last few days have been so crazy busy. I didn't have time to stop and think yesterday. I had a sick and needy baby all day and then I had Eliana for six hours. That is a lot of caretaking. Daphne seems to be feeling a little better today. She is watching her Language Nursery right now. I am hoping that by the time she is two we will all be able to count to 20 in six different languages. I know that I shouldn't feel guilty about putting on a video, but I do. It's not that I think TV is so bad; it's just that she LOVES it so much. I am afraid that I am creating a junkie. I call the TV Mommy II. If it were up to her and if the TV could provide nourishment she would call it Mommy I.

So, I am bored. Yes, bored. I know I can hear other people saying how they could never be bored. Well, I get bored. I have several things I could be doing right now, but they aren't very promising. I could go unload the dishwasher, but that is the chore I hate the most. I am not sure why. I don't mind loading the dishwasher, but I really hate putting dishes away. I could work on the iMovie Jack and I are making, but I get so consumed by it that I will end up ignoring Daphne for longer than I want to. We could go somewhere but I really don't want to have to change a diarrhea filled diaper in the park or at the mall. So, I am going to see if Daphne would like to look at some picture books. I really need to learn to savor the time we have together right now. She is getting so much older and it won't be much longer before she doesn't want to cuddle anymore.

My poor child! I called the pediatrician this morning because Daphne is still waking up several times a night screaming her head off. Jack and I took her in to see if her ear infection had gotten worse. The pediatrician looked at her ears and told us that they looked great and that something else must be causing her discomfort. I told her that she has been having really bad diarrhea lately and has terrible diaper rash. Upon closer inspection her pediatritrian told us that she has ulcerative diaper rash. This means that she not only has diaper rash but blisters on top of her diaper rash. No wonder she has been so miserable. I would be complaining a lot if I had blisters on my bum. Of course I felt like crying, but the pediatrician told me that she has seen much worse and that it was a result of diarrhea not bad parenting. Nice words but I still feel guilty. So, we are supposed to stop he antibiotics today and concentrate on her rash. I guess some babies react poorly to antibiotics and along with diarhea she most likely has a tummy ache. Anyway, that is my depressing update. I hope she starts feeling better soon.

Wow, you read the title and you are still going to read this post. Mighty brave of you. This is the real, well cartoon of The PoopSmith . This is exactly how I feel right now. Now either you are going think that clip is funny or you are going to think that I have lost my mind. I think probably both.

Seriously, I have to update you on Daphne. She is doing better. I am glad the pediatrician told us to stop the antibiotics. She was miserable. She slept on her tummy last night. I know that I am supposed to move her onto her back, but sleeping on her tummy is probably more comfortable. If I were to move her onto her back she would just turn over again. She did sleep 8 hours last night. This is a big improvement, but she still isn't back to her normal sleeping routine. The 8 hours makes me think that she is starting to feel better.

Back to the poo! Jack and I have a new diaper changing routine. We normally use the softest diaper wipes on the market, but her rash is so bad that we can only use water and a soft cloth. Pretty gross! We have to keep a bucket of warm water by her changing table at all times and have to make sure her bum is super dry before putting on the diaper. Her pediatrician suggested using a hair dryer on a LOW setting, but we aren't doing that. We just fan her. I feel so bad for her. It is breaking my heart. We also went on a mad search for a product called Resinol that the pediatrician suggested. It is some kind of rash ointment that is better than the product we are currently using called Desitin . I hope the Resinol smells better! Unfortunately we couldn't find any, so I asked a pharmacist at one of the local drugstores to order it for me. We will be able to pick it up later this afternoon. I hope it helps!

Well, Daphne summons. I will try to keep all of you updated on her well-being.

I know that is a lame title. You have to excuse me. I am very tired. I am not used to being so tired. I wonder if Daphne will ever sleep through the night again. She didn't wake us up this much when we first brought her home. She has always been a very good sleeper. I miss sleep. I am overtired now. This makes me feel very cranky and moody.

I am not sure why she is waking up so much. I think that she is still having painful gas and a tummy ache. She slept for eight hours the other night, but that was on her tummy. She hasn't done that since and therefore has been waking up several times during the night. It wouldn't be so bad if she didn't scream at the top of her lungs like she was being murdered. We have her sixth- month check-up on Monday. I hope the pediatrician will be able to help us figure this out. Oh, and she gets her flu shot. I am so happy about that. Please note I have yet to find a font that expresses sarcasm. After all this mess and misery she is going to have the added bonus of experiencing mild flu symptoms and a low-grade fever. Lucky girl!

Daphne is fine. She is great. She had her sixth-month check-up today. She is doing everything she is supposed to and more. This means that developmentally she is right on track. Her height and weight are still in the 90th and 97th percentile even though she has only gained two pounds since her last visit. The only "problem" we are having is that she is waking up several times a night. Her pediatrician thinks that this is a result of being comforted at night while she was sick. While comforting her at night (and yes, nursing her) is fine when she isn't feeling good, it isn't something we want her to do all of the time. So, now we have the horrible task of training her to sleep through the night. This is particularly difficult since we didn't have to do this when she was younger. I absolutely refuse let her cry herself to sleep. I can't take it. In fact, Jack is in her room right now trying the old bottle of water trick. Apparently giving babies water instead of breast milk or formula makes them not interested in waking up so much. We also don't want to teach her to be dependent on food for comfort.

This parenting thing is very difficult. You want your kids to be happy and secure all of the time, but sometimes you have to let them be unhappy. I am told this is for their own good. Why does it have to be that way? It is so counterintuitive to let your child cry when you know that you have what will make them feel better. Why is it that this culture thrives on creating independent beings? Is it really that important that infants sleep in their own bed? I love sleeping next to Daphne and I know that she loves sleeping next to me. Am I going to create a serial killer if I don't ban her from my bed? All of this is making me crazy right now and my recent sleep deprivation isn't making me very rational. I've got to stop all of this hippie talk before I start listening to The Grateful Dead and making beads out of clay.

I am feeling a little better today. I wrote yesterday's post while listening to my daughter scream her little head off. It was very difficult because I can't be the one to comfort her at night right now. The burden is all on Jack. After listening to her scream for an hour and a 1/2 we decided to let her sleep with us. Our rationale was that we were trying to solve two problems at once. She is both used to nursing at night and sleeping in bed with us because we let her do both of those things all last week. She slept with us last night, but I didn't nurse her. I think this was a good decision because she didn't wake up until 6:30. I was then able to nurse her and put her back in her crib. She slept in her room until 9:30. I guess this is the solution. We are going to take it one step at a time. The only thing that gives me hope is that in the past she has been a great sleeper.

I on the other hand need to stop being such a freak. I realize that this is just one of the many times in my life that I am going to have to make decisions that make her miserable. Trying to balance parental guilt and what is best for her is such a difficult task. I didn't think I would be this way. I thought I was prepared for all of this. I thought that all of my training in behavioral psychology and functional analysis would help me through situations like this. Who knew that I would be such a softy. Just wait until I have to take her to daycare for the first time. Sigh!

Ahh, sleep. Daphne has decided to go back to her usual routine of sleeping through the night. She slept for eight hours on Wednesday and eleven hours last night. She still hasn't made it back into her crib. She is sleeping in her Pack n Play in our room. I think it is very reassuring for her to sleep where she can hear and smell us. Tonight we are going to try the crib. I hope it works. I don't thinks she is uncomfortable in the Pack n Play, but her crib seems so much nicer.

I am also happy to report that her diaper rash has cleared up and she doesn't have a runny nose any more. It seems that she is back to her normal self.

One day I will be able to eat and drink what I want again. I have been Daphne's main source of nutrition for a year and a half and I feel a little frustrated by it. I have to pay close attention to what I eat and make sure that I am getting enough nutrition for both of us. I even take a vitamin for lactating women that is essentially double a regular vitamin. I also have to worry about my calcium intake, which is difficult for a person who loathes dairy. Someday, hopefully very soon, I won't have to drink my daily glass of icky milk.

I really haven't complained too much about this, but I am a little frustrated today. I have a little cough that is making my throat sore. I really really want a cup of chamomile tea. It would feel so good on my scratchy throat. Unfortunately, herbal tea seems to be frowned upon while breastfeeding. My feeling this week is that by January I would like her to be fully weaned. She will be getting most of her calories from solid food by then. Her pediatrician agreed that this would be a good time to start a gradual weaning process. I guess almost a year of breastfeeding is good for a person who didn't want to breastfeed at all. While I still don't think of breastfeeding as the sacred thing that they try to sell you in the breastfeeding class, I do enjoy knowing that I am giving Daphne the best start in life. I also like that she gets all of my antibodies. I really believe that breastfeeding can help fight off disease later in life. Jack was breastfed and never gets sick, I on the other hand was not and I always get colds in the winter. In my mom's defense it was the seventies and women were not encouraged to breastfeed.

Daphne is doing great. We took a drive up to Lake Macbride on Sunday. She really enjoyed looking at all of the pretty fall leaves.

I just have one last think to say. We were in Dillards last night and came across a whole display of Wiggles products. Very exciting. I especially liked the Anthony Doll.

Why is Daphne so angry? She has become the mighty yelling baby. She yells at me if I hold her, she yells at me if I put her down, she yells and yells and yells. She even yells at her toys. Is there anything I can do to make this baby happy? I think this must be a phase she is going through. She isn稚 crying, she is yelling. Hopefully this will pass soon.

I keep thinking that she is going to figure out how to crawl forward. She gets around pretty good crawling backward. If I turn my back on her while she is on the floor she will have moved a foot or two. I saw a baby who looked like he was a month or two ahead of her (hard to tell since she is so biiig). Anyway, he looked like a gorilla when he crawled. He got up on his toes and moved himself forward with his fists. Very funny. I think that is how Daphne will start. She spends a lot of time arching her back up on her fists and toes. She can also move from side to side and turn herself around and roll several times in a row. I am just waiting for that forward motion.

I think that I need Jack to start blocking certain television stations on our TV. I am sick and tired of being upset by what I see on the news. In fact I think that all first year parents should refrain from watching any news at all. Everything is just so negative and SCARY. I don稚 want to watch any more blips about the War in Iraq or about horrible horrible child abuse or about some kids who decided to haze other kids in school. I also don稚 want 兎xperts� telling me that my baby will be brain damaged if I let her watch TV. I am feeling very defensive about that one this morning.

I guess that is all. I am going to go play with the Dapher now. We are going to stack some blocks this morning.

Yesterday Jack and I were at the Sycamore Mall looking at baby stuff and I got to thinking that it had been months since we had seen a movie. In fact the last time we saw a movie was back in July when we were in Utah. It is very hard living so far away from Grandparents. It would be so easy to just drop her off and go and have a peaceful dinner. Taking Daphne with us to a restaurant is no less than a huge pain in the rear. Even though we can FINALLY put her in a high chair, she still demands all of our attention and by the end of the meal one of us is holding her in one arm and eating with the other. Even when we have had people baby-sit in the past, I just end up spending the entire time worrying that she is screaming or has pooped really big or something. I know it is a dumb thing to complain about. Sorry, I will stop now.

What else? Well, I am still freaked out by the number of hours my television is on. I am one of those people who like using the TV as background noise. Even when I am not watching, I still have it on. I didn't think this was a problem until last week when by chance the TV wasn't on and Daphne sat staring at it like she was waiting for something to appear on screen. Since then I have taken extra care in leaving it off as much as possible and putting on some music instead.

Everything else is great. She is still yelling at us, but I am getting used to it. That's all for today unless something major happens like she actually figures out how to move her hands and knees together and crawls forward.

It looks like it isn't going to be too bad of a day. The weather isn't great, but at least it isn't bone chilling cold. I remember trick or treating in the freezing cold weather. It was so disappointing to put so much effort into a costume and then have to put on a big coat over it. At least we got to wear costumes to school and participate in a school wide parade and eat orange cupcakes. Good Times!

When I was in Junior High we would have a Halloween carnival during school, but here they don't do that. It is kind of disappointing to be a secondary school teacher during the holidays. Elementary teachers have all of the fun. When I was working in a second grade classroom two years ago (was it really that long ago?) I actually got to participate in all of the fun holiday stuff. Now all I can plan on doing is showing PG movies that are holiday themed. Maybe I will go back and get my elementary certification. HA HA, just kidding Jack!

So, we hope to get a bunch of fall themed pictures of Daphne up on her webpage this weekend. She is going to be so cute for Halloween. I know that she is only six months old and doesn't care about costumes, but I do. I can't wait until she is old enough to trick or treat.

Well that is all. Have a Happy Halloween and check back this weekend for pictures of Daphne's first costume on her page.

Jack didn't get the pictures up this weekend of Daphne's first Halloween. I promise they are coming soon! For a preview you can go to Aprille's page.

It's raining here and I love it. The sun doesn't come blazing into Daphne's room so early, so I get to sleep in a little longer.

Babies are gross! Daphne has become a spit collector. She sticks her hands in her mouth and gathers a handful of spit and then offers it to us. Thanks Daph! I am not sure how we are going to break her of this habit. Hopefully it won't go on so long that she is giving her kindergarten teacher this special gift.

We bought Daphne her first shoes yesterday. They are pink high tops with little flowers on the side. We also bought some white Keds but they aren't as cute. I know that babies aren't supposed to wear shoes before they walk, but I am worried that she is going to be cold when she goes outside with just socks on. Besides, these are really cute!

Today while I took a shower Daphne listened to a tape Jack's Mom sent us. It is great! She was so calm while listening to her Grandma read and sing to her. This of course is a BIG hint to the other grandparents. Daphne loves it when people read and sing to her and it is so much better than TV!

As I write this I have to warn anyone who is considering having their first child. You will be covered in spit. Yes, spit. Every inch of me is covered in saliva from my child. I am not sure where it comes from, but it is gross. She has some stuffed animals that get washed so often that I am sure they will be faded and worn out before her first birthday. She has this bunny that gets its ears sucked on and then she sucks the spit back. Gross!

My lesson this week has been not to turn my back on Daphne, not even for two minutes. Yesterday she managed to tear a page out of a magazine and suck the pigment out of it and possibly even swallowed some. I thought that I was watching her, but she managed to turn herself around and do it secretly. She doesn't seem to be affected by it, but boy is that disgusting.

I am also very scared now that she has started crawling forward. Thankfully she is still very slow and isn't able to get very far very fast, but I am still scared to leave her on the floor without my eye on her at all times. How do people manage? I have a pack and play that I can put her in, but eventually she starts squishing her face up against the screen. It is so disturbing to look at that I have to take her out and put her on the floor.

Well, that is all the time I can manage. I have to go now because my little crawling spit factory is summoning me.

On Saturday while Daphne was playing tummy down on the floor she turned herself over and sat up. She looked very surprised and proud of herself. Jack and I were also very surprised. She has been trying to sit up by pulling herself up while on her back. This is a very funny sight because it looks like she is doing mini baby sit-ups. I wasn't expecting her to figure out how to turn herself over onto her tummy and then twist herslf into a sitting position.

She did it several more times this weekend and then resumed crawling practice. She is getting better at crawling, but still isn't very fast. She only crawls when she wants one of her toys or wants to get a better look at the books on our shelf. Most of the time she crawls until she can stick her arm out and reach a toy and then pulls it toward her. She can be such a lazy baby.

So, this has been a huge development week for Daphne. She is crawling, sitting up on her own (which makes her so PROUD) and she is trying so very very hard to stand up. She almost has it, but collapses before she can get all the way up to her feet. She can hold onto the couch and pull herself up to her knees. If Jack or I give her support she can pull herself all the way up. I don't know how I feel about all of this development.

I am working on making everything safe for Daphne's new roaming skills. I have put covers on the doorknobs to keep her out of the closets and plastic things in the outlets to keep her from electrocuting herself. I do have to wonder why I need to put a lock on the toilet. Maybe I will just put one of the doorknob covers on the bathroom door.

Jack is going to be home for a week at Thanksgiving and we are going to finalize all of the safety stuff. We are going to try to attach all of the big furniture to the walls. Jack is particularly sensitive about this because when he was a small child a bookcase fell over on him. He still has a scar on his forehead from the accident.

The one thing I am most resistant about is getting rid of my poisonous plants. I guess I am going to have to give some of them away or euthanize them. Very painful for me. They are my children. I have raised most of them from very small plants or seeds. (Silent weeping)

So, Daphne pulled herself up to a standing position while holding onto her crib rail this morning. I couldn't believe it. I don't know whether to celebrate or cry. She is going through milestones like a crazy woman. Proof of this is that she has a bruise on her cheek from falling on one of her toys last night. It won't be long now before she is walking (wimper). Jack's sister was an early walker, so I guess Daphne is following in her footsteps (no pun intended).

Daphne is doing so many things. In addition to sitting, crawling, and pulling herself to a standing position, she now says Dada! I know, I know, she isn't saying it to Jack. She is just saying it as part of her babble. She won't be able to call us Dada or Mama on purpose for several months. I don't expect it to happen until her first birthday. It is still fun to hear. We get so excited that she stops talking and gets a very confused look on her face. I imagine that she is trying to figure out what we are so happy about, so she can do it again and again. This is what happens when she laughs. We laugh so she laughs again. It isn't so easy with words.

While watching Daphne during the day reach all of these milestones is fun and heartwarming, her night behavior is not so endearing. She has wanted to party all night long Lionel Richie style. She wakes up several times a night and no amount of love, cuddling, cosleeping or (gasp) feeding will make her go back to sleep. She isn't mad or in pain or anything. Truly, she just wants to play. Jack thinks it is a developmental phase where she wants to try out all of her new skills, even in the middle of the night. It has been much worse. Back when she had an ear infection her night wakings were awful because she was screaming in pain. This is just annoying.

I have never considered myself a competitive person. So, why is it that I am so obsessed with my daughter's development? I pay way too much attention to whether she has reached all of her milestones by the correct time. It doesn't help that I get a newsletter every week from BabyCenter telling me what my child SHOULD be doing. This usually isn't a source of aggravation because she has been reaching all of her physical milestones, but the last couple of newsletters haven't been so pleasant. Apparently she should be playing with her toys in a more sophisticated manner. The BabyCenter folks suggest that not only should she be able to stack blocks, but sort her toys by type. Hmmm, they don't mention the importance of sticking every toy into your mouth and sucking on it until it is completely covered in saliva. Is this an important milestone or is my child just a little bit odd?

I can tell you right now Daphne is neither capable of stacking or sorting anything. She does try to pull all of my books off the bookshelf. She even managed to pull down a copy of Edward Albee plays. She opened the book and stared at it for a while before trying to stick it in her mouth. At least she has good taste. Oh dear that is my second accidental pun. I am so sorry.

An example of Daphne playing with her toys rather than munching on them was last night in her tub. She has several waterproof books that she likes to have in her bath with her. Usually she is just chewing on them, but last night she kept trying to keep it under water. It was so funny. She was having a very difficult time accepting the fact that if she let go it would come to the surface. She must have pushed on it ten times before giving up. It is moments like these that give me hope she won't be spreading saliva all over the world forever.

You know, I feel like I have spent the last twelve years in a transition phase. One day I am going to wake up and realize that this is my real life. Iowa City is the perfect town for this. Everyone I know seems to be in a permanent transition phase. That is probably why you can't wave a stick around here without hitting someone with three Master's degrees and a Ph.D.

Anyway, Jack and I are having some serious discussions about our future right now. We are trying to figure out what is the best course to take. Our first consideration is Daphne's welfare. Thank goodness I went to grad school before we had her. I doubt I would have gone. We love her, but she makes everything so complicated. We can't just up and move somewhere without thinking about the risks involved.

So, here we are. Jack really likes his job (or finds it stress free). I need to get a job next year or I risk losing my teaching license. I don't know if I can get a job in a town so saturated with teachers in graduate programs. Jack and I want him to get his PhD but we don't know if this is the best time to get further into debt. If only I could win the Powerball, but "you've got to be in it to win it". The only way I am going to win the lottery is if I find a winning ticket on the ground. Even then I would feel so guilty I would probably give it all away to charity.

So, there we are. I feel gloomy about our future, but really I should feel lucky that we have so many options. We could live anywhere we wanted. We both have practical degrees that will provide us a decent income and job security. It is just the figuring out what to do that is soooo difficult.

Daphne is doing great by the way. She is sleeping through the night again. I think the spinach I gave her made her gassy. I will try again in a week or two and see if I am right.

Daphne and I went to the mall yesterday to do some early Christmas shopping. Everywhere we went she would call out Dada Daddy da to everyone who came within one or two feet of us. Believe me, this made more than a few men uncomfortable. Dada is her favorite word. She says it over and over and over and over. Everything is a daddy or a dada or a da. She sings little da da songs. I am sure this is because we encouraged it at first by laughing and I know that Jack enjoys hearing it. I just wish she would add in a little nga or bo bo now and again. I swear she has a bigger vocabulary than just da.

While we were walking through the mall a little three year old girl came running up yelling, "baby, baby!" She came up to Daphne and got very excited about a toy bunny she was holding. In fact she was so excited that she grabbed Daphne's bunny and went running down the mall screaming, "I want a toy!" Her mother was horribly embarrassed and went after her daughter. Daphne remained calm the whole time. The bunny is a new toy and she isn't very attached to it. Had it been her turtle I am sure she would have been very upset.

Daphne had to go to the clinic to get her second flu shot this morning. She received the first half at her sixth month check-up. This was the follow up shot. For some unexpected reason she started to chortle and chuckle while we were in the waiting room. It was so loud that everyone stopped what they were doing and several nurses poked their heads out to see who was laughing so hard. She got her shot, but wasn't too upset by it. Her legs are so thick I don't think she feels much pain. I guess that is one of many good things about having a chubby baby!

The laughter didn't stop when we got home. She laughed while I fed her rice cereal and bananas for lunch and laughed while playing with her toys in her play pen. She is even laughing right now while she naps. I thought she was crying, but when I went into her room she was curled up with her eyes closed tight in a fit of giggles. I guess she was having a good dream.

I also have a reason to be in a good mood. My boyfriend
Colin is on A&E all day today. They are showing a marathon of Pride and Prejudice today.

It rained very hard here last night. Iowa rain is so amazing. In fact, on my short list of things I like about Iowa City rain ranks almost at the top. I grew up in the dry mountains of Utah, so I had never seen anything like it until I moved here. The sky just opens up and rain comes down like someone has turn on a faucet. I really like the rain as long as I don't have to drive in it. Daphne on the other hand did not like the rain last night and woke up crying five or six times. I think she woke up when the thunder was really loud and was mad because she was alone in the dark. It wasn't a great night for any of us.

Daphne is turning into quite the picky eater. She started out so adventurous. Just a few weeks ago she was eating anything I put on a spoon. Well, except applesauce. She has never liked applesauce. Now she refuses just about everything I put in front of her. Yesterday, Jack decided to give her some real banana. Well, she HATED it! I think it must have tasted like ONE THOUSAND bananas especially since all she has known of banana is the bland kind found in glass jars and rice cereal.

This morning I tried to give her some rice cereal, but she refused to eat it. I then tried to give her a mixture of pear, oatmeal, and cinnamon. To me this tastes wonderful, but to Daphne it tastes like something she has to spit back out at me while screaming. The only two things she will eat without complaint are green beans and peas. So, for breakfast Daphne had a whole jar of mushed up peas. Yummy!

By the way, go see ELF. It is very funny.

Apparently the only toys Daphne needs are a burpcloth and a TV remote. These hold just as much fascination as the toys we have bought her. She loves the remote. She hugs it close to her body and then holds it out in front of her for a better view. She can makes sounds with it by slapping it on the floor or on the couch. It has wonderful buttons to push and it has a nice edge for her to chew on. It is the perfect toy. We gave her an old one that doesn't work any more to play with. She was getting very annoyed with me because I wouldn't let her play with the one we use.

Jack is home today. It is more of a vacation for me than for him. I get to have someone here to help me with all of the baby care and cleaning. I didn't think I would even care about weekends and holidays when I decided to stay at home with Daphne, but now I look forward to Jack being home. I can actually take a normal shower and take my time when eating breakfast and lunch. It is also nice because I can run my errands without dragging Daphne along. It is especially hard now that it is getting cold here. I feel so bad about taking her out in the freezing wind. She doesn't seem to mind the cold. She just snuggles closer to me until I get her into the warm car.

We had a nice long Thanksgiving weekend. Jack was home for most of the week and we just hung out and did some projects around here. It was very nice. He is taking some time off at the end of the month. Daphne (if she could understand) and I are looking forward to it.

I had to take Daphne to the doctor this morning. She has been waking us up several times at night for the past week. I think it is because I have FINALLY weaned her from the last breastfeeding at night. I am still feeding her in the morning, but I hope to have her completely weaned by January. This next to last step in the process has been very difficult for her and us. Even though I am sure that is what she is waking up angry about we had to take her into the clinic to rule out an ear infection. Thankfully she just has a little clear water in her ears, nothing to worry about. I was relieved, but a little angry that I had to spend two hours at the doctor's office just to have them look in her ears.

So that is about it. We are looking forward to the holidays. It is going to be fun to have a child around at Christmas. Her aunt Mauria bought her a Keepsake Ornament for our tree. I am a little worried about putting a tree up because she has started pulling herself up by grabbing onto things. You can see her page for more information about her recent development.

So, I have just returned from the eye doctor. While I was waiting for my exam I had to fill out a card with my information like phone number, address, ect. The place I seem to get stuck on a lot lately is the blank space next to the word occupation. What is my occupation? Mommy? Stay-at-home Mommy? Person who is temporarily not working in order to keep her child out of day care for as long as possible? That is what I really want to put, but there just isn't enough space. The one word I really dread is "homemaker". Yuck! The word homemaker makes me think of someone who has a sparkling clean house and has dinner waiting for her husband when he gets home from work. A homemaker loves to craft with her other homemaker friends.

Let me tell you something. Unless making microwave popcorn or putting a frozen waffle in the toaster counts, I don't ever cook. I am not a crafter, unless making cute little imovies of my child is a craft. Whether I clean or not is debatable. I do in fact know how to use such products as Clorox and Windex and I very rarely have dirty dishes in the sink. However, I have not made my bed in three days and I have a huge pile of laundry that may or may not get done by the weekend. Hmmm. Tough one. I would say that yes I clean, but I do not enjoy it.

So, what do other people put down next to occupation? Today I put down stay-at-home-mom. For some reason saying that makes it feel like a choice

DISCLAIMER

After I walked away from this post I thought I should go back and add a disclaimer. Just in case anyone is offended by my post today I just want to say a few things. First I love staying home with my baby. It is the most rewarding thing I have done in my life (even better that getting my MA). I also want to say that I respect all people (men and women) who make choices about working or staying at home. I just think that the job of being a parent doesn't get the respect it deserves in this society blah blah blah you have heard it all before. Anyway, I just wanted to make that clear and I still hate the title of homemaker.

Last night Daphne experienced her first snow. She looked so pretty and lovely in her white coat and purple hat with the snow falling wispfully (is that a word) around her head. I wish I could have taken a picture. We couldn't tell if she even noticed that snowflakes were falling from the sky. She is so easily distracted that I wouldn't be surprised if she missed the whole event.

I don't know if you can tell from the new pictures, but she just recently got a lot taller. Back when she was 3 and 4 months old we used to get a lot of comments about how chubby she was now it is all about how tall she is. I don't know how to take these comments. Sometimes I feel like I should have a black hat and a cane and call out "two bits to see the freakishly large baby". Seriously, do strangers really have to come up to me and inform me of how big my baby is? Why do they think I need this information? Sometimes they tell me that their child was big too, like we are part of some freak show child secret club. It can be very annoying. I don't think she is that big. She is on the tall end of the curve, but she isn't Andre the Giant. In a world where kids are starving and lacking in medical care being a little tall for your age isn't something to get all worked up about, especially since she is just 7 1/2 months old.

Well, we put up our Christmas tree. A little early for us. I guess I am a bit bored or something. I wasn't going to put one up this year because I am afraid Daphne is going to pull it down onto her head or pull the ornaments off. I decided to put the old tree up because for the first time ever Jack wants a Christmas tree. He said that it is important for Daphne to have a tree for her first Christmas. In my mind Jack wanting to help me decorate the tree is equivalent to the Grinch's heart growing three sizes bigger.

I solved the baby danger problem three ways. First I didn't put anything on the lower branches. This way she can't pull anything off. The second step I took was avoiding putting on anything made of glass or that is fragile. The final step in baby proofing the tree was to tie everything with ribbons instead of using those sharp hook things. I took one look at those and thought about all the horrible things that she could do with them. So, lets all hope that there aren't any baby plus tree catastrophes this year.

For now she seems a little frightened of it and doesn't to want to go anywhere near it.

You know, I think that the lesson I have learned from being a parent for these last eight months is that I need to learn to trust my own instincts. I have made some huge mistakes like maybe just maybe I fed her too much early on and she has suffered some diaper rash because of my overuse of diaper wipes. When it comes to the important things like her health, well-being, and ability to sleep through the night I think that I have done a good job. She is a happy, chubby, giggly baby. I love her so much, especially when she falls asleep next to me and I can feel her little breath on my face. I just fall in love with her over and over again.

This leads me to my thoughts today. There have been several times (three to be exact) when Daphne has gone through a sleepless night phase. These phases have lasted anywhere from one week to three weeks and have been the result of ear infections and some bad gas from eating some spinach (that we later found out had milk listed in the ingredients). Otherwise, Daphne has been sleeping through the night since we brought her home from the hospital. She is a deep sleeper who has been known to sleep through diaper changes and baths. Each time she goes through a sleepless night phase people have told us that we need to let her "cry it out". We aren't "crying it out" type parents. We are the type of parents who bring the baby to bed with us. We even took the bed off it's frame so it would be lower to the floor because we were concerned she might crawl off the side. We also have surrounded the box spring with a moat of blanket and pillows. It looks strange, but it makes it safe for her.

So, for the last week and a 1/2 she has been waking up several times a night. Jack and I are exhausted. I even took her to the doctor last week to see if she had an ear infection. Many people have told us that we should let her cry. They inform me that she will never learn to sleep on her own if we don't do this. I agree that sometimes babies wake up upset because they are alone and some babies have a difficult time with sleep. If Daphne hadn't proved herself a deep sleeper early on I probably would have let her cry it out a few times. But, this post isn't about whether it is right or wrong to let your baby cry, it is about my instincts as a Mother. I knew something wasn't right with Daphne and I was correct. This morning she reached over and bit my finger and lo and behold she has some top teeth coming in. Good Grief! What if I had let her cry through the night like people told me to? Can you imagine being in pain and having someone put you in a dark room and close the door while you are screaming? I can just see Jack doing that to me. "You don't feel good?" "Well, let me put you into bed and close the door so you can just scream it out." It makes me sick to my stomach to think of my child all alone while she is hurting. You know some books that I have read suggest letting your child scream through the night even if they have tooth pain because there isn't anything you can do about it. I swear, that is almost a direct quote from one of my baby books. I think maybe I will go throw it in the trash. Horrible!

So, very long post, but I am a very emotional about this subject.

Yesterday Daphne gave me a good scare when she stood up in her playpen and let go of the sides. She stood solo for about five seconds before falling on her bum. She stood with her arms out and a look of extreme concentration on her face while she tried to balance herself. Very cute, but scary. I predict she will be standing up solo by Christmas and walking not long after that. The reason I think this is because she stands in her crib (while holding onto the rail) and lifts her legs up like she is marching. Is this a prewalking activity? It sure looks like it.

I am sitting here in one of my maternity sweaters from last year. It is so comfy. I have about six of these that I wore over and over. I feel ok about wearing them at home, but I wouldn't go out in one. Well, maybe I would if I wanted people to be nice to me again. People are so nice when you are pregnant. They open doors for you and let you go ahead in line at the grocery store. The only exception to this was when I would go downtown. The students weren't exactly the most gracious people. A fine example of this was when I fell face-first off of the escalator and no one offered to help me up. Selfish college students!

Daphne is asleep. I have found a new way to get her to take a nap. We slow dance to Olivia Newton John. Something about the Xanadu soundtrack must be very soporific. This poor child is going to have the worst taste in music. When we aren't listening to "I Honestly Love You" or "Suddenly". I put on some Karen Carpenter and dance in a two step Junior High fashion. Ahh bliss!

The baby is 8 months old today! Oh my gosh and golly! I can't believe how fast time is flying!

It is exciting to see Daphne develop new skills and improve on the old ones. Seriously though, it is getting annoying. I am exhausted of saying, "no!" I can tell you that Daphne comprehends what I am saying. When she goes for plugs I say "no." When she tries to climb into the dishwasher I say, "no." When she unwraps one of Jack's Christmas presents I say, "no." When she grabs my hair and pulls on it really hard I scream, "NO!" She understands what I am saying because she stops what she is doing. I am not sure if it is the word or the way I say it with my firm teacher/mommy voice. Because I believe firmly in behavior management and want to reward good behavior I always thank her after I say, "no!" How long will this last? I bet another month and then she will just ignore me. Maybe by then she will be bored of pulling all of my books off the shelves and move onto something more annoying like dumping the trash all over the floor.

In other recent developments that I have neglected to write about is that Daphne can feed herself a bottle. She has been doing this for about three weeks now. Jack is the one responsible for teaching her. He decided over the Thanksgiving holiday that she was ready to hold her own bottle. He worked very hard at this and now she can sit in her playpen or in her highchair and feed herself. Just recently Jack started giving her a few Cheerios. It scares me to see her eating something that she could choke on, but he watches her very close. We are just doing what the pediatrician told us at her 6 month visit. She said that Daphne would be ready to eat finger foods when she was 8 months old. It is still scary.

We had a nice weekend. We finished up our Christmas shopping and finally got everything shipped off to Utah. On Sunday we took Daphne to the Iowa Children's Museum. She loved playing in the water and climbing over the big soft blocks in the baby and toddler room. We will have to go back soon.

Daphne has started speaking in a low growly voice. I guess I shouldn't have called her Damien in the womb. She says, "daddy, dada, daddy" over and over again in a voice that sounds like she has been possessed by some demon. It can be kind of creepy (and funny). I guess as long as her eyes aren't turning red and her head isn't spinning around we are safe.

I am trying to capture it on camera, but it is very hard. If I do manage to capture it, I will have Jack put it up on her page.

I have been listening to a lot of holiday themed music lately because the local radio stations are playing 24 hours of it. I like most Christmas music, but there are a few songs that get on my nerves. So, for your reading pleasure I will list my top five most detested Christmas songs:

1. Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer. (Do I need to explain why?)
2. Little Drummer Boy
3. Do You Hear What I Hear (especially when sung by Whitney Houston)
4. Christmas Shoes (A song about a boy who doesn't have enough money to buy shoes for his Mom who is dying of cancer.)
5. The Twelve Days of Christmas

The top five best songs are all from the Charlie Brown Christmas special and the Carpenters Christmas cd. I also like a song called "What are You Doing New Year's Day", but that isn't a Christmas song.

Any thoughts?

Sorry this isn't about Daphne, but it is my blog too!

I usually do the grocery shopping on the weekends. It is a good excuse for me to get away from the family and be by myself for a while. It is also a great way for Jack and Daphne to spend some quality time together. BUT, yesterday I had to get some stuff from the store. I bundled Daphne up and put her in the car seat (this should be considered for an Olympic event) and took off for Hyvee. Of course she fell asleep the minute we were on the road and stayed asleep while I took her out of her car seat and carried her into the store. I thought she would wake up as soon as I put her in the grocery cart, but she stayed asleep. In fact, she flopped forward and rested her head on the handle. I put my coat under her head so she would have some padding. She stayed like this for almost the entire time. She woke up in time for me to wait in line at the check out. Believe me, she looked very confused when she woke up. So, why oh why can she sleep while being dragged out of a car seat and put in a rickety cart, but she can't sleep in her crib for more than 10 minutes (for naps)? She is a deep sleeper at only the most unusual times. When we bring her home from somewhere she will sleep through her coat and shoes being taken off, but the minute her head hits the (flannel) sheets she wakes up. Strange!

Oh, now that the weather is colder Daphne is wearing a new snowsuit (thanks Grandma!). She looks like an angel in it. Well, she looks like an angel when she is sleeping. If you thought she hated hats, boy does she hate the snowsuit. I have some great grumpy pictures of her wearing it. BUT, we LOVE it! It is very comforting to know that she is warm and snuggly when it is cold and windy.

Daphne is really attached to her bottle. I think it is going to be harder to wean her from it than it has been to wean her from nursing. She has begun demanding a bottle in the morning while I am trying to feed her cereal. So, Jack and I have started giving her a sippy cup full of water instead of a bottle after feeding her solids. She seems to like it almost as well as the bottle. She does drop it more often which can be a huge pain. When does the drop it so Mommy and Daddy have to pick it up game end?

We have also introduced biter biscuits . You wouldn't think that a hard cookie that tastes like a stale Nilla Wafer could be so messy. She sucks on it until the end is all mushy and then somehow gets it all over her face and hands. Gross, gross, gross.

We are excited about Christmas. Having a child around makes me want to do Christmassy things. We went over to Bryon and Mauria's on Sunday and made disgustingly good sugar cookies. I ate about a hundred and fifty of them. I guess my need to ingest lard based sugar products is more important than losing that last 20 pounds.

So, it is the day after Christmas. We had a very nice holiday. Bryon and Mauria came over on Christmas Eve. We ate some really good pie that Jack made and opened a couple of presents. We watched part of the Nutcracker until Bryon and I counted how many times we had seen it (too many) and tu